Parental Alienation and Divorce
Parental alienation occurs in divorce when a child develops an unreasonably strong dislike of one parent that makes an ongoing relationship or visitation with the rejected parent difficult if not impossible. Here’s how parental alienation impacts your children for years to come. By Judge Michele Lowrance As a domestic relations judge since 1995, I have watched the wreckage of the corrosive legacy of parental alienation and visitation interference play out over decades. We have no statistics for measuring this group because the victims are too vast. But the concentric circles include th...
4 Common Mistakes When Co-parenting with an Antagonistic Ex
Although there might be bumps along the road, most parents are able to put their children first and become successful co-parents post-divorce. Sometimes, however, one spouse can’t let go of the bitterness and anger caused by the failed marriage; consciously or unconsciously, the angry ex attempts to turn the children against the other parent. By Amy Baker (Ph.D.) and Paul Fine (LCSW) How you handle your emotions when your children are experiencing loyalty conflicts is important. Start by trying to avoid the following common mistakes when co-parenting with an antagonistic ex. 1. Giv...
8 Signs That Your Child Is Caught up in a Loyalty Conflict
If you’re co-parenting with an ex who engages in behaviors that induce loyalty conflicts, your child might become alienated and exhibit the eight behaviors described in this article. It’s important for you to develop a sense of the ways in which your ex may be turning your child against you, and the signs that your child is being affected. By Amy Baker (Ph.D.) and Paul Fine (LCSW) Some children who are exposed to behaviors that may induce loyalty conflict can maintain a relationship with both parents. Unfortunately, not all children are resistant to parental pressure. Some get caught...
The Essential Elements of Your Parenting Plan
Children go through many stages and phases growing up, and having a clear and thorough parenting plan can help keep you and your ex-spouse on the same page in terms of how to raise your children. Here are some of the most important elements to consider when putting together your parenting plan. By Carolyn Ellis When you get divorced and have children, you’ll be required to create a parenting plan which is a written document that spells out how you agree to parent your children. The parenting plan needs to be clear and practical and keep the best interests and needs of your children in ...
Top 10 Tips for Divorcing Parents from a Family Law Attorney
Divorce can be an emotionally complicated and trying time, especially when there are children involved. As a family law attorney, mediator and coach, the author has seen a lot of ways parents mistakenly end up hurting their children in the process. These tips will help you keep your focus on your children’s needs. By M. Marcy Jones Divorce is such a complicated process, and there is so much emotion that needs to be sorted through. Putting your children’s needs ahead of your own isn’t easy, and parents constantly have to check in with themselves to make sure they are doing so. Many ...
Stepfamily Dynamics
Stepfamilies are unique and individual – what works for one family may not work for another. Understanding the dynamics of your children and partner in the new constellation of your stepfamily helps create more harmony, trust and connection. By Jeffrey Cottrill Stepfamilies have unique and changing dynamics you need to respect and navigate along the way. "It's important not to diminish the biological, non-residential parent in any way," says Lillian Messinger, author of Remarriage: A Family Affair. "The children have a right to that parent's love." Ex-spouses will still be linked to ea...
20 Signs of Parental Alienation
Parental alienation occurs when one parent starts to alienate the affections of the children so the child does not want to be with or spend time with the other parent. It can have a devastating long-term effect on the children’s relationship with both parents. You may need to seek help from your family law attorney and/or a counsellor to help stop this pattern of behavior. Here are some of the most common signs that parental alienation could be taking place. by Douglas Darnall, Ph.D. To prevent the devastating effects of Parental Alienation, you must begin by recognizing the symptoms o...
Setting Ground Rules In Your Stepfamily
With two of three remarriages ending in divorce, it’s clearly challenging to successfully create a happy and lasting stepfamily. Preparation and good communication go a long way to helping you overcome the challenges of re-marriage, blending families, and stepparenting By Jeffrey Cottrill Stepfamilies are very different than a “traditional” family where all the children have the same parents and require new rules, guidelines and agreements than you might have been able to use before. Experts say that clear, all-inclusive plans are necessary to make a stepfamily work. Who spends tim...
Making Co-Parenting Easier
You can ease the challenge of co-parenting with an ex-spouse by planning ahead and seeking professional help if necessary. Here are five tips to help make co-parenting easier post-divorce. By Brian James When parents divorce, it is the beginning of a new partnership in co-parenting their children. Co-parenting goes much more smoothly when there is a plan in place; it assures that no matter how you feel about your ex-spouse, the children's interests will come first. It's important to determine if you and your ex-spouse are comfortable enough to communicate directly about co-parenting i...
Life after Divorce: How to Tell When You’re Stuck
Life after divorce is challenging, especially for a single parent. Here are signs that you might be "stuck." By Carolyn Ellis Divorce is a game-changer and can turn your whole world upside down quickly. It’s easy to lose sight of the forest for the trees. Without creating a big picture for our lives (the forest), it’s easy to get stuck in the daily issues of being a single parent (the trees). All parents have a lot on their plates, but single parents have additional responsibilities. For you, life can be a blur of managing your children, rebuilding your life, dealing with your ex,...