How Divorce Affects Teenagers – Part 2
When parents divorce and children are subjected to negative changes as a result, the experience can be very painful for their children. Learn how divorce affects teenagers, how to recognize that your teenager may be having trouble coping with divorce in your family, and some helpful steps you can take to ensure that they to grow up to be happy, healthy adults. By Donald A. Gordon Ph.D. and Jack Arbuthnot Ph.D. How to Help Your Teenager: Provide consistent supervision. Most parents need to improve certain parenting skills; this is true even if a marriage is solid. The preteen and t...
How Divorce Affects Young Children
Young children aged six to eight years often have very strong emotional responses to divorce and need support from their parents to cope with these emotions. With these strategies, you can learn how divorce affects young children and help your children adjust to life after divorce. By Donald A. Gordon Ph.D. and Jack Arbuthnot Ph.D. Children aged six to eight years old respond most often with grief. They express their grief through crying and sobbing; this happens with boys more than with girls. They also feel a deep yearning for the absent parent. The children will miss that parent inten...
How Divorce Affects Teenagers
When parents divorce and children are subjected to negative changes as a result, the experience can be very painful for their children. Learn how divorce affects teenagers, how to recognize that your teenager may be having trouble coping with divorce in your family, and get some helpful steps you can take to ensure that they to grow up to be happy, healthy adults By Donald A. Gordon Ph.D. and Jack Arbuthnot Ph.D. Most parents ask themselves some hard questions when they split up. Parents wonder what the break-up will do to their children. Will the children understand what’s going on? ...
How Divorce Affects Preteens
With greater emotional maturity under their belt, how divorce affects preteens who are in the 9-12-year-old range differs from how is affects younger children. Here’s how to help your pre-teenage son or daughter cope with issues related to divorce and children. By Donald A. Gordon Ph.D. and Jack Arbuthnot Ph.D. Preteens – children aged 9-12 – have a different and more mature response to a divorce than younger children. This age group is more advanced in their thinking, and they are able to see many points of view in the matter. Most of these preteens can understand some of the rea...
How Blended Families Differ from Nuclear Families
Just because you’ve found someone you love after divorce and want to spend the rest of your days with doesn’t mean your children will be so loving or excited about the new stepfamily. There are some important differences between a blended family and a nuclear family that can help you get your stepfamily off on the right footing. By Jeffrey Cottrill Although blended families, or stepfamilies, have become much more common and accepted in recent years, people still fall into the trap of expecting them to run on automatic. The most frequent mistake that people make when marrying into ste...
What to Do When You and Your Ex Have Different Parenting Styles
Co-parenting your children after divorce often shows how different your parenting style is from your ex. Here’s how to manage the potential conflicts and confusion different parenting styles can cause. By Carolyn Ellis Different homes may mean different parenting styles. Different rules about bedtimes, homework and household chores between mom’s house and dad’s house can make clashes and conflicts inevitable when co-parenting with your ex. When you were married or living together, parents typically assume a “united front” in parenting to provide consistency and clarity for t...
Why Having a Vision for Your Life After Divorce is So Important
You will be co-parenting with your ex for as long as you have children. Having a vision for life after divorce is a powerful tool to help you live your life on your own terms. Here’s why! By Carolyn Ellis You will be co-parents with your ex for as long as you have children. Don’t let yourself be constrained by the current state of your relationship or worries about how you’re going to achieve your vision for your life after divorce. Vision is a powerful tool for everyone, from single moms and divorced dads to CEOs and everyone in between. Businesses, governments, and other large...
3 Tips for How to Tell Your Children You’re Getting Divorced
Getting divorced isn’t easy especially when you have kids. These three tips can help you deliver the tough news about your divorce in the best possible way to your children. By Carolyn Ellis "Mom and dad are getting divorced" is the conversation every parent dreads telling their children. There’s no easy way to share the news with your kids that life as they have known it up until now will suddenly become very different. When you are absolutely certain that your marriage is not going to work, it’s time to let your children know you're getting divorced so you can frame the decisi...
Parenting Mistake: Turning Children into Messengers and Spies
Sometimes parents use their children to deliver messages about changes in visitation or to get information about what’s happening with an ex-spouse. This unfortunate parenting practice sets your children up to be in the cross-fire between their parents. By Carolyn Ellis Too often, children get caught in the crossfire of the divorce game their parents play. It’s a big parenting mistake to put your child in the role of messenger for communications that should take place between you and your ex. “Initially, I did ask my nine-year-old son to convey information to his father for me,...
The Truth Parents Need to Know About Divorce and Children
Divorcing parents always pledge to keep the welfare of their children in mind, but this lawyer/mediator/coach continually sees parents break that promise in the divorce process. Here’s the real truth about divorce and children and how a parent’s behavior and choices can impact their children. By M. Marcy Jones As a lawyer, mediator and coach, I cannot emphasize strongly enough how important it is for the well-being of your children that you and your spouse find ways to deal with your conflict without becoming enmeshed in a legal battle during the divorce process. The truth about divo...